Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Chloe Alexa Christensen

Man, words can't even express how much I love my best friend Chloe. She is SO sweet and shes such a doll. Not to mention how hilarious she is. 

feeling better. weeeee! warning: kind of a selfish post. sowwy!

so im finally feeling worlds better from being sick. yay for being back to make up & doing my hair! i still need a tan but a big thanks to the Utah weather for playing hide and seek with the sun. either the "finder" is counting too long before it's time for them to "seek" OR they're just puppy guarding the base. whatever the case may be, find the freakin sun & show me some love por favor. 
xoxo, brooke


peeeeople. my boyfriend & i broke up. that's all i'm gonna say about that. am i looking for someone else? definitely not. i have a few guys in my life that i need to start playing very close attention to before i miss out, so im focusing on those nuggets.

not a whole lot is new since i last blogged because i haven't done much. i finish my summer school class this saturday which is exciting, then im off to cali for 2 weeks! i can hardly wait. i desperately need a vacay.

anyways, since ive been feeling better and have been getting ready which i havent done in a full week, im not taking it for granted. here are my looks from today & yesterday. what do you think?
TODAY: so i sometimes i wish i was a model... HAHA bless my heart! i'm wearing classic blue jeans, a cheetah tee, neon pink under tank, brown wedges, gold statement earrings. 
YESTERDAY: Summer chic or gypsy? I'm wearing a black maxi skirt, lace print chiffon top, gold & black layered necklaces, & a class brown belt. what do you think? i loved it! it was comfy :) perfect first day out into the world outfit.
the colors and edges in this pic were cool. dats why i likeyyyyy.

love all of you!
xoxoxoxooxoxoxoxo, brooke

Saturday, July 9, 2011

Being sick SUCKS

i have been sick this whole week. stomach flu :( spare me, i know. i got sick on tuesday while at work. gross! i know. luckily, my sister is the owner of my work and i'm the manager. otherwise, that would've been really awkward and embarrassing. so i left work early, called my mom in tears because i always cry after throwing up and she told me to go get a sprite in which i was ONLY allowed to sip. same instruction as when i lived at home. and to buy some ice chips to eat if i needed. she suggested sonic. so there i was. a gross, acidy-y taste in my mouth, looking half dead, wet eyes, at the sonic drive in ordering a sprite with no ice and a bag of ice. i'll never forget the worker's look when i pulled up to the window. 

i came home, crawled in bed, and passssssed out. i slept like crazy that night & the next day, wednesday. i was feelin a little better the next day, thursday, so i did some laundry and cleaned my room. these things just had to be done and sometimes it's good to still be productive when you're sick. 

friday i woke up feelin the best i have. so i went to work all day then when i got home me and some friends went to the carnival in american fork. we rode some of the rides. then played mini golf at trafalga. then went to the institute dance for a few. then in n out to eat. by the time i got home, i was second guessing everything. i wanted to make myself sit in time out in a corner & punish myself for letting me do everything i did that night. i felt sick again... SURPRISE, SURPRISE. i had overdid it. i slept just an hour before i had to take my friend to the airport at 4am. keep in mind that i have saturday morning class 8am-12pm. and i was planning on working til 6pm. you can decide for yourself what ended up happening... i pulled up to my apartment following the drive back from the airport. called my parents where it was only 4:30am crying and saying how awful i felt and that i had all these responsibilities for the day. they both instructed me to email my professor and tell her im sick, and to get in bed and REST! i slept 6am til 3pm. 

i still dont feel that great but i guess i just wanna say when youre sick and you start feeling better, STILL REST! dont make yourself do tons of stuff cause all of a sudden you feel a little bit better. ive been sick so many times in my lifetime. some a lot more severe than others. so i should know this by now. but that's clearly still a work in progress...

ANYWAYS... being sick makes you grateful for the simple things in life:
thank goodness for season one of the OC on dvd keeping me sane.
thank goodness for the breaking news on the casey anthony case keeping me on my toes and keeping my brain flowing while sick. still in shock about the verdict though. luckily judgment occurs beyond this world.
thank goodness for loving friends and roommates to check on me constantly and drive me places.
thank goodness for not wearing make up or doing my hair for days.
thank goodness for ritz crackers and sprite.
thank goodness for comfy clothes and the comfiest twin bed. that's college housing for you.
thank goodness for the fun thunder & lightening storms lately, creating a bit of excitement the past few days.
thank goodness for texting and people keeping me company and in tune with the world while im in bed.
thank goodness for tetris on the iphone.
and last but not least, thank goodness for family who call every hour or so to check up on me.

and a BIG thank you to my parents for sending me the most precious cookie bouquet in the world. it made my day and once again proved that i have the most caring and thoughtful parents in the world. i've truly been blessed. PS) this picture was taken on Friday when I thought I felt better... even though i am a bit pale.. :( welp! now it's back in bed for good. no make up on, hair a mess, wearing sweats in the summer time. CHEERS TO LIFE! ;)

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

i forget to blog when life goes so good!

oh my goodness! soooo many things have happened that I wanna write about, but where to start? i'll start with a few tuesdays ago at institute. BEST lesson! we learned about being true disciples of Christ. we learned about nourishing your spirit and testimony daily which will ultimately help you come to know your Heavenly Father and his Son, as well as increase your knowledge of the gospel, increase your testimony, and have a better time overcoming temptation. it was great! 

just a few days after that, i was asked out by the boy ive had my eye on for months now. anddddd he made me his girlfriend. he made it official at the strawberry days fair. cute, huh? :) so yup, i have a boyfriend. craaaaazy for me, i know. i havent had a boyfriend since last DECEMBER!! what can i say? im really picky and i need someone who keeps me on my toes. jake definitely does the job. he's to die. he's from australia, my age, and has an accent that makes me melt ;) haha on a more serious side, this kid makes me feel on top of the world. he keeps me young. i often times forget that im only 19 years old. im still just a baby girl! he's helped me to not worry about so many things and be a little more carefree and less serious. we have some of the best talks. we help each other be our best selves. he's in my ward so that's how we met. we talk church stuff all the time. he has such a great, inspiring story to tell and he has such a neat and strong testimony. he's obsesssssssed with learning foreign languages. half of the time he's speaking spanish and half of the time its cuuute. the other half requires a few threats from me. haha. such as he can only sit up front in my car if he speaks english the whole time. anyways! he's a great guy. i wouldnt be with him if i didnt think we deserved each other. everyone says that we're a little random and they would've never thought, but that's the beauty of it. we're both sooo different, but alike in ways too. we create a great balance, and all in all, OPPOSITES ATTRACT! ;) you da bess jacob <3

i was in vegas this whole past week visiting family and friends. suuuuch a fun trip. i got to lay out by the pool with my best friend kelly all day. at night we went to dinner and shopping and i got to take a fun pic with my dream car a land rover ;) which was SO nice. i went shopping with my momma. out to dinner a whole lot. then my last night there, i went over to my best friend destiny's to see her and hang out with her and chloe! she's getting married so we had to get some wedding and party plans together! it's so exciting! im so happy for her. she's gonna be the most beeeautiful bride!

i hurried back from vegas to be in class at 8am saturday morning! gave my persuasive speech on the benefits of reconstructive surgery to those affected with disfiguring birth defects. i taught sunday school on sunday on loving one another which was fabbbulous! i love teaching so much :) i met jake's parents on sunday too. they're dolls :) 

yesterday (monday) we went to seven peaks. it was sooooo crowded! but fun & hot hot hot! after seven peaks, we had FHE at bishops house which was way fun. jacob surprised me after fhe! he was gone sunday after church and after he came over and surprised me AGAIN and said he wouldnt be back til tuesday but he actually got back last night so i got to see him. i looove his surprise visits. that's what i mean when i say he keeps me on my toesies! after all that, a group of us from the apartment went and then played capture the flag and let me tell you that i captured the flag!!!! we were tied after 2 games so game 3 was the tiebreaker in which i captured the flag for us. that was a fun moment :) that's why i tell people, never underestimate me! ;) hehe

today will be great also. got institute tonight! weeee! and i think my mom comes back to utah this week. yay yay yay! life is great! God is great! loves!! xoxoxoxo

Friday, June 17, 2011

Venting is different than complaining.

Where do I begin? This has been the weirdest last few days in awhile. I was getting ready today thinking, why do I feel let down here? Is it just me or is it because of him? Can someone be a "let down"? Or is it just another's perception? I say to you, yes. Meaning it goes both ways. Someone can definitely be a let down, or you can decide for yourself whether you'll let them be. I'm gonna go with the first one, but down the road, I hope to switch to the second one. I want to get to a point where I don't care when I shouldn't. My problem? I certainly DO care, too much. I'm just that kind of person and it's natural for me to care about anything and everything. But during certain circumstances, I wish I was more passive and numb to it. I feel like being that way wouldn't leave any room for people to let me down. Going along with this, I'm a firm believer in being happy on your own. I feel like one must be stable, independent, and happy on their own before they can let someone into their lives that might change that. How easy is it for someone to make you feel bad, low, or insecure? SO. I feel like I'm constantly striving to be that girl that doesn't depend on anyone else for MY happiness. My attitude, feelings, and emotions are MY responsibility. 

Obviously, I'm boy bitter right now. Why am I putting in more effort than they are? Is that wrong? I think so. I believe in balance and equality. I don't think anyone is better than the next. Why do I put up with so much when I know I deserve better? I'll tell you. Because every girl, including myself feels like they can help or fix a boy... or at least has a burning desire to do so. Sometimes I feel like it's my responsibility to help some of the guys get back on track with their lives, and it partly is. However, when it interferes with my life and my well-being and my confidence, it's gone too far. I need to be there for them, but not get sucked into their ways. This topic brings me to the next question/concern...

What am I doing to attract these kind of guys? I'm also a firm believer that you attract your equal -- you get what you give. I feel bad when I think, I must be doing something to attract the crowd that I am. But, I know that's not entirely true, and I shouldn't think like that. However, it's hard not to. I've been in this place before where I've felt alone and low, and I wrote myself a journal entry. It read, 
"I've become this really insecure and dependent girl. I'm pushing my family away, the ones i love the most. I'm allowing people to depict my feelings and moods. From this day on, I'm going to stand a little taller, I'm going to drive myself harder, I'm gonna be the strong-willed and confident girl that I used to be. I'm gonna be genuinely happy with myself. I'm not gonna depend on others for my happiness. I'm gonna grow closer to the Lord and share my burdens with Him. I'm gonna grow more spiritual and down to earth. I'm gonna surround myself with people that bring out the best in me and don't put me down. I'm gonna love someone and take a risk of getting very hurt. I'm gonna be the smart, intelligent student that I've been. I'm taking on the old me as of now." -written August 9th, 2009 @ 3:13am

I WILL get back to that strong-willed, confident young woman I used to be. I need to be completely happy on my own before I can seriously let someone into my life. I know that everything around me is happening for a reason and the Lord's way of showing His approval or disapproval, but that doesn't make it easy -- not like I expect anything to be easy entirely, but you know what I mean. I'm ready to do me and get to being the Brooke Christine Baxter I'm meant to be. 

PS) I have the greatest girlfriends in the world.
BIG thank you to Kelly Sunbury & Meghan Bodily :)
Love you girls!

Lyrics to one of my very favorite songs:
Stephanie Smith
"Better Off Alone"

I used to find myself attracted to the boys with broken wings.
They kept me grounded and distracted from the wounded parts of me
And still I swore he would be different, although his story read the same.
With a little fixing, he'd be perfect, yeah, but once again, I stand corrected.

I should've known better 'cause it only feels worse each time. 
And I'd better surrender this search. 
'Cause I know until someone finds me and inspires me to be better, 
Well, I'm better off alone.

And when the right one comes, how will I tell that it's not just some disguise?
Well, I'll see a stronger version of myself reflected in his eyes.
And looking back now I can say, that I've never been quite sure
about that love that I told myself was real. Oh and each invitation that I settled for.

I should've known better 'cause it only feels worse each time.
And I'd better better this search.
'Cause I know until someone finds me and inspires me to be better,
Well, I'm better off alone.

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Why did you KISS me?!

probably one of the most darling vids out there right now. boys will be boys!

yay for seven peaks today! i went with my 3 favorite people. my baby sister, rashad frank nijim, and landon macray winn. weeeeeeeee! it was super fun, but i got sunburnt :( i hate having such fair skin!

after seven peaks we all went to eat at costco. delish! and i had institute at 7 but i wasnt sure if i was gonna go because i would not have had enough time to shower and get ready without being late. but something told me that i HAD to go tonight. i just couldnt miss it. i washed my face real quick, curled my air-dried chlorine-filled hair, and threw on my fave cheetah fedora hat and was off! my baby sister joined me,. that was fun & special :)

there was a definite reason i felt like i couldnt miss class tonight. the lesson was amazing. the Spirit was so strong, and i got an answer finally that i've been praying for within the lesson. the first part talked about disciples of Christ and that attributes associated. the ones that stuck out to me were: 1) learning of Him and His life and following His ways, 2) service, and 3) disciplined. the second part of the lesson talked about getting to truly know Christ. i learned that we can truly get to know Him when we are diligent in doing so. we learn of the gospel and His teachings little by little and at times when those specific lessons are meant to be learned and appreciated. i learned that i can come to know and love my Savior by doing the basics everyday whether it be big or small. whether i read a verse of my scriptures, or a chapter, it all counts. like the scriptures say, "by small and simple things, great things come to pass". that verse couldnt be anymore true. i want to come to know my Savior conhacer, not saber. ;)

today was especially special spending the day with my little sister. even though, she's not so little. homegirl is 16 years old and how surreal it is seeing her drive all on her own, especially in utah! i mean, this girl comes & picks ME up for stuff. i'm loving it. my little sister has always been the peacemaker in our family and thats something i really admire about her. though she can't be pushed around, she will bend over backwards to do things for other people. i love that about her also. she's a strong-willed young lady and i'm hoping the more i hang out with her, the more her strength will rub off on me. Bri has a smile & laugh that lights up any room and a personality that makes those around her happy and comfortable. i love you weez. thanks for being such a good example to me and our family.

in closing, i just want to mention a certain somebody. we've talked on the phone just about every night and text here & there throughout the day. anyways, this kid is a sweetheart. down to earth, smart, worthy, and super cute. our conversations follow me throughout the day because of how uplifting and exciting they are. im looking forward to where this one goes.

here's a video that i absolutely looooooove... it will touch you, i promise.

xoxox, brooke

Monday, June 13, 2011

sensitive monday.

so i was planning on going to seven peaks with friends today but the weather is moody! its cloudy & windy/breezy. NOT a good look for swimming, so i went to the gym instead.

this workout? decent. didnt have a whole lot of energy and my body is a bit achey but i pushed through and treated myself to a rice bowl at rumbi grille afterwards :) SO good.

I REEEEEALLLLLYYYY WANNA GO HIKE THE Y! if anyone's down, please holla atcha girl.

i'm gonna start reading this book called, "the energy bus". my family raves about it, so i'll keep all you fine people in the loop with that one. i also need to read "hunger games". i started it last year and never finished it. i haaave the finish it before the movie comes out.

OH and you all should know that i got a 9.5 out of 10 on my informative speech that i presented for my public speaking class -- in which i mentioned in my last blog post. that was exciting news :) and one of my classmates even messaged me on telling me that my speech was awesome. it's reassuring to know that hard works pays off and sticks with people. just another one of life's special gifts.

yesterday (sunday) was a special day for me. church was great as always and my friend came who hasn't been there in awhile and we had so much fun. she's a doll and such a sweet spirit. someone came over sunday afternoon and we sat on my bed and read one of my church books. it was such a special time and sweet experience. i'll treasure that time we were able to share and grow together. church wise, the sacrament talks were great, sunday school was great, and the relief society lesson was great. we talked about missionary work -- one of my fave topics! because low and behold, i'm a convert along with my entire family. 

growing up in summerlin, a community within the las vegas valley, my family and i were surrounded by many members of the LDS church. obviously, LDS kids were my friends growing up as well as friends to my other two sisters and my parents. my family has always been extremely close and tight-knit. However, there was something missing...
anyways, i spent a lot of time with a particular family in my neighborhood, the alger's -- a family that lived only 2-3 houses down from us. they were adamant about holding family home evenings every monday night and took the missionaries out to dinner all the time. of course i was involved in these activities because i was over at their house quite a bit and hung out with this family just about every day. i was apart of their family home evening activities and i was always invited along to dinners with the missionaries. ultimately, one of the missionaries challenged my friend, whitney alger, to give me a book of mormon, in which she did. and from then i would bring it to school and read it during my 7th grade reading class "read & journal time. i got a few weird looks, especially from my teacher, but i couldnt has been more proud to be reading that particular book. 
i had been to the LDS church several times, i attended achievement days, and church activities and programs, and ultimately, i wanted people to know and think that i was mormon too. and that's when i made my mom take me to deseret book to get me CTR rings ;) haha good times. 
anyways, i became so serious about joining the church that i went out on a limb and asked my mom about it. it was a friday night, and my family had gone to dinner at the palms hotel & casino in vegas. my mom & i had gotten up to go to the bathroom and on our walk there i turned to her and said "mom, i want to be mormon and i talked to whitney and she said that her dad could baptize me. but i dont want him to because i want my dad to." my mom was a little surprised, but not opposed to the crazy statement i had just presented. she said, "brooke, mormonism isnt just a religion, it's a lifestyle. but i think it's cool and a good idea, and i'll definitely talk to your dad about it and we'll go from there." she talked to my dad that night, and he was a bit surprised as well, but not opposed either. 
the next night, all of us neighborhood kids were playing outside, including the alger's. and coincidentally ( though not at all ;) ) whitney's mom had asked my parents if were wanted to go to church with them on sunday. long story short, they accepted and we went the next day. that was a great day for me. i had been to church with the alger family plenty of times, but it was so special that my very own family was there too sitting in the same pew as me :) 
following church we had gone to breakfast and talked about it. my dad had us go around the table and tell what we thought about having had gone. i was sitting in my seat just hoping that they all loved it, and they did. my older sister said "i thought it was great. i felt something there that i've never felt before." i'll never forget those words from her.
it was within days that the missionaries were sent to us. fabulous missionaries. elect missionaries. the missionaries meant for us. we took the lessons and listened to the discussions. we asked questions, we were taught how to pray and did so at our meetings. just weeks later, my family, as a whole decided to be baptized. my mom and dad were baptized the first week of november 2002, and my sisters and i were baptized the following week, BY MY DAD. it was exactly what i wanted and more. i was baptized by my father and joined by my whole family. a year later, we were sealed as a family for time and all eternity in the las vegas temple. as mentioned before, my family's always been close, but we were ultimately missing the Spirit in our lives and in our home.
what are we all up to now? well my dad has served in many callings including young mens, high priest, emergency preparedness, and others. my mom has served in the young women's program, primary teacher, as a ward missionary, and now in the nursery program. my older sister brittany has attained a temple marriage to her husband trevor. my younger sister is in young women's now and has served in presidency's with the program. and as for me? i served in young women's presidency's back when and now i'm greatly involved in my single's ward in utah, having served on the family home evening committee, and now teaching sunday school -gospel doctrine, and aspiring to meet a worthy young man who honors his priesthood, sweeps me off my feet, and takes me to the temple to be sealed to him and my future family forever.

it's crazy to think how simple things turn into great ones... i'm grateful for the experiences the gospel has brought to my life. it's not always easy, but that's part of the plan. i know the Lord watches me and loves me and wants me to share my blessings with those i come across. i know i have a specific mission on this earth and not a day goes by that i don't feel a sense of purpose. i'm trying my very best to make conscious and good decisions that will enrich my life now and in the future. i'm extremely grateful for the ward i've been blessed with, for a loving bishop and his wife who have become my parents away from home. for a bishopric who loves us and takes time out of their lives and their families to get to know us young people and to teach and prepare us for our future. i'm grateful for a family who's always 110% supportive. i'm grateful for my roommates and friends both in UT and LV who have brought strength, light, and joy to my life. i watch them everyday and aspire to gain some of the same traits they possess. i'm grateful for church leaders and for the prophets and apostles who lead and guide us in the church today. their counsel is divine and they truly know what we need to hear. i'm grateful for missionary work and its ability to bring light and purpose to people's lives. i'm grateful for education and it's something that i pray i'll never take for granted. i'm most grateful for my loving Heavenly Father and his Son, Jesus Christ. i'm grateful for the love, hope, and comfort i get from learning of them and having faith that everything will be okay and work out according to their will. i'm grateful for the atonement and my knowledge of how real it is. i love this gospel and the joy it brings to my life. i'm so lucky and grateful that it was brought to my life at such a young age, blessing me and my family.

happy monday :)
xoxoxo, brooke

PS) “Cultivate an attitude of happiness. Cultivate a spirit of optimism. Walk with faith, rejoicing in the beauties of nature, in the goodness of those you love, in the testimony which you carry in your heart concerning things divine.” –Gordon B. Hinckley

About Me

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Salt Lake City, Utah, United States